50 Reasons Not To Date A Poet

Just couldn’t leave it alone. Had to rewrite!

Betty Generic

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It may sound romantic but, consider this first …

  1. In search for that elusive metaphor, poets can be somewhat “eccentric.”
  2. They have deep conversations with Animals, clouds, and Grecian Urns.
  3. If you date a poet everyone will think you are the jerk they are writing about.
  4. You will be the jerk they are writing about.
  5. Excessive use of  “Poetry Hands.”
  6. Excessive use of  “poetic licence.”
  7. Excessive use of  “melancholy.”
  8. Excessive use of  “apostrophes.”
  9. They collect antediluvian words that have not been in circulation for at least 100 years or more.
  10. They look for opportunities to insert obscure words into conversations just to rebel against the modern world.
  11. They think children’s films and books are sublime.
  12. They refuse to care where the remote is.
  13. All  their furniture will be positioned around windows for them to stare out for hours at a time.
  14. Your parents will think they are possessed.
  15. They are…

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